Before You Were Born - My Pregnancy Journal Part 1 - Embryo Adoption

I found my pregnancy journal the other day. It is almost exactly three years ago that three little miracles were born. I am again amazed at God's faithfulness even in the littlest of details of our lives to the most critical. This is dedicated to all of our children as a testament of God's love to us all and His perfect plan for our family.

If you are new to our blog you really should read our adoption stories all the way thru Part 5 first. It will make more sense!
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Fall of 2007 - Written before our first adopted frozen embryo transfer


You're Not Here Yet
You're more than a thought, a dream , a hope....You are a life waiting....We're waiting too.... for God's perfect timing! It has to be in His perfect time as all our children have been. We have learned long ago and are still learning that we control nothing. As hard as that can be at times, it also gives Hope and Comfort. Remembering what God has done in the past and seeing what He's doing in the present gives our life meaning ,our dreams hope, and our souls the deep contentment in knowing that He loves Us, more than we can comprehend. I want you to know this above all else. To know the Joy Giver, the Peace Giver, the Love Giver.


You are not here with us yet, but you are already in our hearts. God is already preparing us and those around us for you. You are not a mistake, a stroke of luck, or a burden, but a wonderfully, unique, precious gift from our Creator. His ways are higher than ours! And I'm so glad!


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February 6, 2008


We would've traveled to a far away country if we had to, to get you. But God brought you to us! We would've gone to the ends of the earth to find you! But God dropped you (heaven sent) into our laps and hearts. I watch "adoption stories" on TV and get excited for the couples, because we've been there. I watch "baby stories" and am in disbelief that I could even hope to carry you inside of me. You are in my heart. But to help you grow, to feel you move and to experience what I've never experienced before will be a huge miracle!


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February 8, 2008 - Transfer Day


I've had a few "God Moments" already. The song, "The fingerprints of God" by Steven Curtis Chapman came on the other day and it was the first time I stopped to listen to the words. "You are covered by the fingerprints of God" and "Your a masterpiece" "unique creation". Those words were reassuring to me that God  has you covered with His fingerprints and will take care of you!


This time (transfer) I was excited going to the clinic. We transferred two in November and my heart was really guarded. Daddy and our donor family thought for sure I'd get pg then, but I wasn't counting on it. Sure enough no pg. But this time is totally different. I had a confident happy peace. When we got into our room the Embyrologist said all three (there were three in one vial) thawed successfully! Then a new doc came in and was very excited. I got to watch on the monitor all of you sploosh inside of me. Before he left, he gave my tummy a pat and just smiled! I knew!! 


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February 17, 2008 - Church


The most incredible service!!! I was in complete tears as we watched a video on God's creation. The Universe and Beyond. This man showed us how much bigger some of the suns in our galaxy and beyond are compared to a golf ball which represents earth. And then to find yourself on that little golf ball. How tiny we really are compared to the things God created. And He knows MY name! Then I thought about how much smaller these 3 embryos are in my womb.! Wow! He went on to mention the human body. That a cell adhesion protein holds our entire body together...And guess what? The protein is in the shape of the cross! No kidding! Wow! God is holding these little ones together completely! Then our Pastor prayed for us and the future of these three babies! 


As I stood up to sing after the sermon, I noticed the front of the bulletin cover was of a person standing at the end of a dock on a lake. I stared at this, because I knew right then and there that God had answered a prayer of mine 5-6 years ealier! I was at a Women's Retreat with my BFF, Teresa, and I remember on that dock God letting me know I'd get pregnant someday. It was a huge thing to carry away from that conference, trying to truly believe it. Then I looked at the cover again and saw that the woman on the dock was standing with her arms outstretched praising God!!!! He loves us so very much!


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February 19, 2008 - Test Day


I felt excited and a little nervous today driving to the clinic for the blood draw. The sun was shining and I felt peaceful and happy! At 2:30pm I got a call from the nurse and she said, "Congratulations!" The beta level was 532!!! A low positive would've been 100. What does that mean? She told me that twins have been as low as 100 and singletons as high as 500.


When Daddy came home from work, I told him I had to run to the bathroom and to check on dinner in the oven. He opened the oven door to find a baby basket w/ 3 buns inside! We've got "Buns in the oven, baby!" He was shocked that I knew, because he didn't think I was going in until the next day. It was so much fun surprising him! He was very excited! 


I called Auntie Jill and Uncle Scott (our donor family) first. They were very excited! Auntie Jill and I talked for about 45 mins. Then I called Grandma, Aunt Terri and Aunt Denise. Daddy had lunch with Papa and surprised Nana at a luncheon with her friends. Nana opened a present with 2 pacifiers in it! She was so excited!




Happy 3rd Birthday to our "Babies"! I know I need to call you all something else! I'm working on it!
We love you all so much! Happy, Happy, Happy Birthday!